Rejection.

How do you handle rejection?  Is personal rejection different than professional rejection? If so do you react differently?
In my case it's artistic rejection, and I do not like it. Today I received my very nicely written rejection email from The American Academy in Rome.  It went something like this:
Dear Serena Van Vranken,

Thank you for your application for a Rome Prize fellowship. When the jury met recently, they carefully considered your application materials. I am writing to inform you, on behalf of the American Academy in Rome, that the jury did not recommend you for a fellowship in Visual Arts.

Academy juries change every year, and a previous application in no way compromises your chances of winning a future fellowship. We hope that you will consider applying again, as many Rome Prize Fellows have applied more than once before being selected.


I guess I was more delusional than I imagined, as I am really disappointed. And was secretly putting off making some decisions until I heard from them. Now what? 


The AAR gets hundreds of applicants each year.  most of the winners are professors or are pretty far along in their careers but I was still hoping. It was a sort of tough application - you must have all the usual stuff plus an essay outlining your project.  Basically my project was painting the modern Roman in ancient Rome.  I'm intrigued by how old the city is and how modern man functions with in it.  I was excited to paint ancient architecture with the everyday modern men and woman interacting with it. Guess I'll start thinking about a stronger concept for a project!  


I haven't talked too much about my oil painting on this blog. Some of you may not even know I'm an oil painter.  Here are the photos I sent for the application process.  http://serena-van-vranken.artistwebsites.com/
I hope you'll take a moment to check them out!  I apologize that I'm not able to post any photos from the computer I'm working on at this time.

Thanks for listening to me whine.  Sweet dreams.

ps. It occurs to me, now that I am posting this publicly, that for me embarrassment follows rejection. But I'm sharing it anyway.  As this is what I've promised this blog is about.  Trials and tribulations.